The year is almost over. I still feel the same, but somehow I don't want it anymore. At least not as much as I did a few months back.
Maybe I was just lured by the fact that it is something I cannot have. You know how people are, they covet the one thing they cannot have because of the possibility of something in the future.
Maybe I was just as insecure as everybody else that I don't want to fight for it anymore. It's pointless if it expressly and impliedly tells you that it can never be yours.
Maybe I am just too old for this. I am convinced that all the nice things that happened occurred out of respect.
Maybe I am, in reality and in appearance, inferior.
... And maybe this is not what I thought it was. Maybe something else.
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